Your inner Werewolf – three easy rules to keep it in check

Everone, not just women, has a lycanthropic side. For some this is revealed under stress, for some it requires caffeine to reign in, and for some, well, let’s just call it lunar and leave it at that.

There’s no way to prevent the werewolf part of you from taking over now and then. What you need to do is put restrictive measures in place so that your interactions while in werewolf form are at a minimum, which helps prevent ripped jugulars, crushed skulls and awkward explanations of the fresh blood stains and muddy paw prints. But, you’ve probably already experienced the aftermath of an uncontrolled werewolf rage and had to pick up the pieces.

So, how do you prevent the carnage?

First, know your trigger! I am not a morning person. My werewolf, however, is. The only way to keep him under control is to consume quite large doses of caffeine. Unfortunately, the caffeine delivery system of choice is on my way to work. I make sure that I don’t have to interact in any kind of meaningful way before 10. This means no blog comments, no tweeting and most of all, no meetings. Anyone I do have to interact with understands that asking for things first thing in the morning is likely result in their head being bitten off.

Your trigger may be very different, but I guarantee you know what it is. It might be talking to idiots, stress, stress caused by dealing with idiots, traffic, idiots in traffic, low blood sugar, the Dragon (although the werewolf may help you here some of the time) and of course, idiots. Once you start to see the recurring theme, you can try and avoid it.

Second, Know how to take control of the werewolf. My werewolf form craves caffeine. The only reason blood is ever involved is when it stands between me and the caffeine delivery system. Trust me, this is not where you want to stand. Hippos and water have nothing on Werewolf Gareth and caffeine. You may have other methods for bringing the werewolf back under control, meditation, sleep or heavy metal at full volume. The important thing is to know what works and to have it available.

Finally, know when to apologise for becoming a humanitarian (something that eats humans). It’s going to happen. Some people just have a knack for being in the wrong place at the wrong time, and others are just idiots. If the person inadvertantly stumbled across you while the werewolf was dominant, a heartfelt apology and offering to pay for the medical bills is the accepted approach. If the person is just an idiot, well, you should probably apologise (but it doesn’t have to be heartfelt).

That’s all, 3 simple rules. Follow them and you should be able to function as a “normal” member of society, without anyone needing to find out about your animalistic tendencies.

This is a special post. It is part of a promotional tour of blogs put together by Katie Elzer-Peters from The Garden of Words to promote her friend Christine Johnson’s new book, Claire de Lune, which a novel about a 16 year old girl who happens to be a werewolf. A bunch of different bloggers who write about all sorts of different things (except werewolves) are participating. You can find other blogs that are participating in this unique promotional tour here.  Fight Mediocrity is participating because it looked like fun, I like to read, and, I needed an excuse to write about werewolves other than “because they’re cool”.