The Pinky and the Brain guide to World Domination

This post forms part of the great Cartoonival of Wisdom, an idea that was born out of a number of DM’s to Kathleen from Biznicillin.  In an attempt to suck up to Johnny start a new internet meme, we decided to use the cartoonival to celebrate the 17th of August.  (Because, if you’re going to be a brown-noser, there’s really no point to doing a half-arsed job.)

I’ve always been a fan of Pinky and the Brain, long before the engineering faculty made a shirt with their picture and the slogan “There are 2 types of people, Engineers, and Peasants!” But that firmly cemented AYPWIP (which I’ve always pronounced Ape Whip) Narf, Zoit, and “The same thing we do every night” into my psyche.

Given that Brain never succeeded in his quest for world domination, you may be wondering what we can learn from his struggles.  The trick here is to learn from his successes. You must also heed  his mistakes so you don’t have to repeat them.

Know the difference between a goal and a plan

Brain knows this implicitly.  He wants to take over the world (<— Goal).  Everynight, he tries something different (<— the plan).  The only time he veers off course from his chosen destination is when he must face his Archnemesis, Snowball, and prevent Snowball from taking over the world so that the world is still available for domination by Brain.

Always have a plan

Brain always has a plan.  None, apart from the ones to save the world from Snowball’s machinations ever succeed.  But he has them.  Normally in explicit detail.  Where the problem comes in is in deviating from the plan.  You need to be a little flexible, in case you end up with a partner who’s idea of a stimulating conversation revolves around tea interjected with the odd poit or narf.  Trying to stick to the plan in the face of overwhelming evidence of imminent failure, is not commendable, in fact, it’s bloody stupid.

Choose your companions carefully

Brain, being a cage lab mouse is limited in the quality of minion he can attract, and fortunately for the world, he is stuck with the incompetent Pinky. (although after watching a few episodes you do begin to wonder whether Pinky is in fact the Super Intelligent test specimen and Brain is the minion, but that’s a whole other discussion for a different August 17th celebration).  Most of Brains ingenious schemes are stopped dead in their tracks by the poor implementation by Pinky.  Perhaps if Brain was more inclined to get his paws dirty, and less inclined to leave critical bits for Pinky to do, we’d all be begging to kneel at the feet of the charismatic dictator.

Implementation is Key

You can have the best plan in the world, but plans have no value.  No plan ever won a war, no plan ever yielded world domination.  It all boils down to implementation.  If you can rock the implementation, you can survive with a half-baked plan, or you can get someone else to give you a good one (Megan and her idea creche spring to mind).  But half-assing the implementation and your world domination goal will remain just that, a goal.

Finally, Never assume people know what you intend to do

At some point, much like the inevitable killing of Kenny, Brain asks Pinky “Are you pondering what I’m pondering?” (see, AYPWIP, it’s like TINSTAFL, but less nerdboy).  A question to which Pinky responds with some line that has no relation to the current conversation/plan (like I think so Brain, but isn’t that why they invented tube socks or my personal favourite, I think so Brain, but where are we going to get rubber pants in our size)  Assuming that people have the same level of knowledge or motivations as you is a sure fire way to calamity.

So remember, stick to your goal, be willing to change your plan, don’t keep company with idiots and always have the right size rubber pants.

4 Responses to The Pinky and the Brain guide to World Domination
  1. kittychunk
    August 17, 2010 | 7:23 am

    Egad Brain! Great post, but we’ll never get a monkey to use dental floss.

  2. Kathleen Jaffe
    August 17, 2010 | 12:26 pm

    … to prove their mousy worth, they’ll overthrow the earth…

    Dammit, I can’t get that song outta my head now! Love this, Gareth! Learning from failure (preferably, someone else’s failure) is a good thing.

  3. Gareth
    August 17, 2010 | 2:18 pm

    The only surefire way to get a song out of your head is to sing it all the way through, you do know all the lyrics don’t you.

  4. Gareth
    August 17, 2010 | 2:19 pm

    for the full dose of AYPWIP’s check here http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Pinky_and_the_Brain

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